Fat Goggles

7 days on a pre-op liquid diet will make your fat goggles come off.

When did I get this big?

Seriously.

I was sitting on my Gran Gran's bed on Sunday night and I looked up and caught a glimpse of me in her mirror above her dresser. I didn't even recognize myself. When did I gain THIS much weight?

This is day 7 of my pre-op diet. I HAVE NOT CHEATED 1 TIME.

Let me tell you, it has been T.O.R.T.U.R.E. all the obstacles I have had to overcome. But, you know what? I DID IT! I did it myself, with help from God!!!! Let me just replay to all ya'll everything I have had to go through food wise.

1. I had to SERVE food, I could not eat, to over 100 recovering drug addicts.

2. Anthony's family had me a birthday party. Sweet huh? Guess what it was basically a freaking cook out. That I could not eat. Home made hamburgers, chicken fingers, rotel dip (if you do not know what this is....it is a southern speciality......1 can of rotel (diced tomatoes and green chillies), hamburger meat, and the biggest block of velveeta cheese you can find, all melted and cooked for hours in a crock pot), and 2, not just 1, 2 cookie cakes. They ALL ate this why I ate some nasty tomato soup and sugar free jello. I will have to add that it was nice for his mom to think of me and make me tomato soup, but it was actually HELL watching everyone else eat that.

3. My whole entire family decided to go eat at Olive Garden last weekend. They invited me to go. I just couldn't even go. Too much TEMPTATION. I ate chicken noodle soup instead. Not the noodles or the chicken......just the soup part.

4. I had to cook for my church. I had to make homemade chicken and rice soup. I had to shred delicious roisterer chicken, that I could NOT eat. I also had to make homemade spinach dip.

5. I had to help set up a table of food as long as an entire room for our church meal after service. Half of the table was nothing but desserts. I had to watch everyone else eat and eat and eat, tons and tons and tons of food. I had some juice out of the soup I made. Not the chicken or the rice.....just the soup.

6. There was a huge cake there on Sunday. Probably one of the biggest cakes I have ever seen. My brother in-law made it. He makes the best birthday cakes you have ever tasted. I mean THE BEST. There was at least half of the cake left. You want to know what I got to do? It was my job to cut the cake in gigantic hunks and wrap them up for people to take home. I couldn't even lick my fingers.

Is that not some obstacles?????

Did I mention I am almost, almost, like if a couple hairs fell out of my hair, away from 8 pounds down?????

8 pounds.

I have lost 8 pounds.

I am really proud of myself.

Tomorrow I start my clear liquid diet. I get to do fun stuff tomorrow also. I go to my nutrition class, go to my pre-op appointment, and meet my surgeon. I also get to clean my poop out. So much to look forward to :)

I still can not believe I have accomplished a liquid diet for the past 7 days. I never dreamed I would be able to do it. I think I just knew I had to. This is my only option left. I have to make it work. I feel like I will make it work. I feel good today. I have felt good since I have gone on this diet. I feel light. I am happy. 7 months ago this all seemed like a dream. It feels like a reality now. I know I can this. I already am doing it!

Serenity.

I am on day 3 of my pre-op diet. Pretty good so far. I know it is really really weird but I actually feel good today! I had a massive headache yesterday, and was not sure I could take anything. I had been told previously not to take ibuprofen, alieve, motrin, or aspirin. So, I was a little concerned on whether I could take ANYTHING at all. I emailed my sweetie pie RN at my surgeons office and she said tylenol would be fine!!! Yay, no headache now. I really believe it is from no caffeine or sugar for the past 2 days.

I was a little disappointed this morning when I got on the scale and I hadn't lost an oz. I guess I was so shocked yesterday when I lost like 3 1/2 lbs. I expected it again today!!!!! I don't think I am going to weigh myself everyday anymore........never mind I know I will. It is just so weird because I NEVER loose any weight. It feels so weird that I actually did loose a couple of pounds. The last time I lost weight on a diet was probably over 2 years ago. I went to this steroid crazy Dr. That put me on a weight loss program. Basically just took lots of my $$$$ :) He tried to prescribe me diet pills but I wouldn't take them at first because I wanted to do it on my own. I lost 13 lbs. in 1 month. I was so excited. I only ate foods that "God" made...basically only natural foods. The next month I only lost 5 lbs. he told me it was horrible and it was like kicking him in the balls. Can we say inappropriate??? He then used cussed words in the same sentence he talked about going to church. Oh, and used the "N" word, because he was mad at African Americans because they built muscle easier than him????? Needless to say I never went back.

I had to go to Walmart AGAIN yesterday! I actually got hit on by a creepy man. I was walking into Walmart and this creeper say "Hey good looking, how are you?" Gross. It scared me. I didn't know what to say so, I said "Thank you!" I know, I told you it scared me and I didn't know what to say!!!!

Last night was a huge accomplishment. I like to say it was indeed a Labor of LOVE. Every month our church helps out with a drug recovery program called Celebrate Recovery. We provide the recovering addicts with a meal, serve the meal to them, and then our Praise Team sings the Praise and Worship for their service. I always enjoy going. Sometimes we go 2x a month. Last night it was hard!! We weren't serving anything special. It was just sandwiches, chips, brownies, and drinks. But, let me tell you!!!! A person on a liquid diet has a hard time serving ANYTHING!!!! I was serving the chips......In front of me was huge OPEN bags of every kind of chip I would DREAM about eating right now. I am talking Cheetos, Doritos, Plain, Sweet Heat, Sour Cram and Onion. You name it and we probably had it there. I had to serve everyone who came through the line hand fulls of CHIPS!!!!! Guess what, I did it! Even though it would have been SO easy to just eat 1 chip. I didn't! It really was a LABOR of LOVE! It made me feel good! Like.."Hey I can do this!" I didn't sing last night because I was a little weak. I don't think I am getting enough protein in still. I just sat in the audience and WORSHIPED! I felt such at PEACE! I actually cried. I love having ALONE time with GOD!!!

Protein shake this morning was a little better. I added frozen strawberries instead of just plain ice. I am not 100% that is aloud, but they were blended VERY WELL ;) I only put 1/2 a scoop of protein in it also. I know that's not right but I figured I can add a little more every time. Maybe this will help me get used to it!!!!! Other than that I will have a low fat cream of broccoli soup for lunch. Low fat yogurt for breakfast snack. Sugar free jello and pudding for afternoon snack. Some kind of brothy soup for dinner. Oh, and another protein shake hopefully!!!

At Celebrate Recovery we always say the Serenity Prayer with everyone before we leave. Even though I am not a "drug" addict, I still find it very positive and it helps me. I'll leave you with it!!!

God, grant me the Serenity
To accept the things I cannot change...
Courage to change the things I can,
And Wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time,
Enjoying one moment at a time,
Accepting hardship as the pathway to peace.
Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is,
Not as I would have it.
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His will.
That I may be reasonably happy in this life,
And supremely happy with Him forever in the next.
Amen.

I just want to eat some ham.

Good Morning Blog World!!

This is day 2 of my pre-op diet.

Have I mentioned I hate protein shakes?

Well, just for the record I do.

I dreamed about ice cream and cinnamon rolls last night.

Want to know the good news......I am down 3 1/2 lbs. this morning!!!!!!

What? Can this be POSSIBLE?????

I really would like to just eat a ham today.

Ham.

I am not sure why, but ham sounds really good to me!!!!!

In all seriousness I guess I am doing good. Have not cheated, so that's great!!! I didn't get enough protein in yesterday. I am suppose to be getting in 60 protein and at least 64 oz of water. I did way more water than that yesterday, but didn't get my protein in. I will try harder today! I have already drank one protein shake so far......moving along!!!!!

I ended up going to the grocery store 2x yesterday!!! Someone on a LIQUID diet should not be aloud in a grocery store!!!!!! It was pure torture. Stuff I would never even eat all the sudden sounds great to me!!!! I made it out alive and still on my liquid diet!!!! I am going to try not to go back anytime soon!!!! I can't believe I was down 3 1/2 lbs. this morning. It just doesn't seem real!!

The Perfect Place

If ya'll haven't noticed I got a new blog layout!!! I love it! I think it is so cute!!! I am also changing the name of my blog!!!! It used to be called "Band Me....I'm Ready!" I love that name also because trust me, I AM READY TO BE BANDED!!!! But, after thinking about it, and realizing that this blog is about so much more than just my journey to be banded, I decided to come up with a more versatile name.....

"The Perfect Place"

I think that suits me perfectly!!!!! I am at the perfect place in my life right now! I am excited about this new journey I am about to embark on! I'm excited for the changes that are going to be made!

"The Perfect Place"

I want to thank each and everyone of you for commenting on my previous post about "What if's....."! I am in such a better place today than I was a week ago! I am still nervous but it is an excited nervous! A nervousness because I KNOW this is exactly the perfect place!!!

I went to my last 7 month appointment on Monday on my birthday!!!!! It feels surreal that THAT is over with! I had a long talk with my Doctor that I love so much! She has really been awesome this whole entire time! At the end of the appointment she hugged me!! :) Told me everything was going to be fine, and that THIS was the right thing to do! I just really love her.

I have a surprise for everyone!!!!!

Want to know what it is???

I have started my full liquid diet today!!!

Does anyone want to know why????

I talked to my weight loss surgeons office today, and Mary's procedure is getting very close!

So close that they told me to go on my liquid diet asap, like right now!!

Want to know another secret????

I didn't find this out till like 10 am......

Guess what I ate for breakfast????

King size Twix bar, a large pack of Lance Gold N Cheese bits, and a 12oz Dr. Pepper.

Let's just say that was a little embarrassing when I had to tell the nutritionist what I ate for breakfast this morning!!! She is a sweetheart and said it was fine, but to start my full liquid diet right then.

And THAT I did!

I went home and made me a strawberry protein shake for lunch. It isn't the GREATEST thing in the world, but I AM drinking it ;) I think I need to work on my shake making skills!!!!!

This is what I am allowed to have:

decaf, unsweetened tea or coffee

light juices

sugar free jello

sugar free popsicles

propel water

crystal light

broth

low fat cream soups

sugar free pudding

v-8 juice

tomato soup low fat yogurt

fat free milk

carnation instant breakfast

protein supplements - 2 or 3 a day

at least 64 oz of non carbonated beverages a day / limit caffeine

So what do ya'll think????

I am excited. Much more excited than I thought I would be! I have put THIS all in God's hands and I know HE knows what HE is doing!!!!